No good deed goes unpunished. Went to Bed Bath and Beyond for Dad this morning to check to see if they had an item in stock. A specific K-Cup coffee maker. This conversation occurs in the area of the coffee makers as i’m standing in front of the k-cup pots:

“You know you’re killing the environment with those machines right?”
I turn slowly unsure if the shrill voice is directed at me, “You talking to me ma’am? Because I’m looking at coffee makers.”
“Yes, those K-cup machines kill the environment.”
“Ma’am, do you just hang out here in Bed Bath and Beyond to protest the purchase of coffee makers?”
“No, but I saw you over here and hoped I’d help save the environment.”
“Interesting, so what kind of hybrid do you drive?”
“I drive a non hybrid Subaru, but it is zero emissions.”
I smile from ear to ear and say, “ma’am, that’s not possible. An internal combustion engine is not zero emissions.”
“BUT I PAID EXTRA FOR A ZERO EMISSIONS CAR.”
“Well, that’s fantastic for you, but you might as well have paid for an invisible jet. You got neither.”
“I paid an extra $3,000 for zero emissions.”
“Does it have a tail pipe?”
“Yes, I actually just had the muffler replaced.”
“What do you think it’s there for–the tailpipe? Why do you think that’s a part of the engineering of the car? Do you think Subaru put it there for looks or do you think that pipe actually emits the exhaust from your gasoline powered engine? Maybe you should worry a little bit more about your carbon footprint and a little bit less about mine.”
“But I paid extra. . .” starts tearing up.
“Ma’am I’m terribly sorry you got duped, but I have k-cups to brew and immediately throw the plastic shell into the garbage. Have an excellent day driving your pollution machine around the greater Raleigh-Durham area. Do you know where the spray deodorant is located? “